annabel songbird

I love this picture that Gary took of Annabel in the recording studio.  She is finishing her EP.  There are four songs, I love them all.  She is our unique poetic indie rocker. She is really doing her own thing. She has put so much time into her music the last two years, I am really proud of her.  On this album she sings, plays guitar and bass. And she wrote all of the songs.  Can't wait to share them with you all!

this girl

Is and will always be in my heart.

Happy birthday Skylar!  You are eighteen today!  Wow.  It's amazing how time flies when you are having fun.  It is such a joy and an honor to be your mama.  I have learned so much from you.  You give so much love and kindness to others.  You are a wise person, and a great friend to many.  You have so many talents.  I admire your perseverance. You try hard at things, even if you aren't the best at them.  I love how you fill our house with music.  I love how much laughter you bring to all of us.  I love how you set the bar high for integrity in this family, and are such a great older sister to Annabel and Shawn. Your care for them and lack of competition keeps such a good vibe in our home.  We all love you so much!  And we celebrate you, that you were born into our family, that we get to share a life with you.  I cannot wait to see where your life takes you.  

You made me a mama, and that is the greatest gift of all.           

how is it

That I am so blessed to have people that love me all over the world?
My friend Shahla of Mother Miracle School sent me these photos today.  She was thinking of me and said a prayer for me and floated a bowl of leaves filled with flowers on the Ganges River just for me.  I am so touched.  And aren't the photos soooo beautiful?  What a reverent custom.

where do i begin?

It has been a long time.  This is the first time since beginning blogging that I have skipped posting for an entire month.  The last couple months have seen my computer broken, packing for travel, travel to distant places, including flying over a few seas, Sky doing SAT prep and taking the test, and a little illness thrown in, just for fun.

It seems like a lifetime ago that we watched Shawn in his end of the school performance, playing the part of a humorous king, a part he was quite comfortable portraying.  Shawn is our little confident king.

There will be lots of photos to share, eventually.  Since May 22, 2104 we have been to Los Angeles, upstate New York to see my parents, Italy, France, New York City, and now, my favorite place on earth, northern California.

Sometimes things are a struggle, and sometimes things flow with ease.  Lately, especially in the last week, in our temporary home in northern California, things have been flowing with some ease.  There have been some incredibly pleasant surprises. Quite a few actually.  It's so very nice.

I'll take it, and I'll bow.

what a hike

Look at this blue water.  I haven't seen water this color since taking a boat to Catalina Island in 1986.

That day we drove with the kids down country roads, past old houses and fields with a lone horse that looked at me.  We parked our car and put on sunscreen and hats.  We walked way way way up a paved road for at least twenty minutes until we came to an unbelievable vista.  At the top of the mountain there was a fence with lots of padlocks attached to it, locked onto it for eternity.  On the padlocks couples had written their initials, a sign of their commitment to one another.

mothers

So many of the photos I have of my mom include my children.

She was there helping me each time a new baby came into our family.
My kids adore her.  She is fun, creative, thoughtful, considerate, generous, classy, funny, a superb cook, and always has a warm smile to greet us when we visit.  Gary wants to add that she is also great to be on vacation with!  As an adult I really enjoy time with my mom. We have so much fun shopping, going out to lunch, talking walks, and of course, talking.

I still can remember the time I came home in tears over problems with peers, and she rocked me in the rocking chair and hugged me, even though I was twelve, my knobby kneed legs dangling.  There is nothing like a mother.

We live far away and so we have to make the most of visits.  I hope someday to be able to live closer to my parents.

My kids tell me that I'm a great mom.  I tell them I learned from the best.

Happy Mother's Day Mom!

Love you.

corner view~good memories

The year is 2006.  We are gathered in a small rural town in Pennsylvania for my maternal grandmother's 100th birthday.  My parents and siblings are there with most of their families.  My aunt, uncle, and cousins have come as well as another aunt and uncle from my father's side of the family.  We are six months early from Christmas day, when Grandma actually turns 100.  But this is the time when most of the family, who are spread out all over the country, can gather.  My grandmother has never been demanding and this time is no different.  She is so happy to see us all.    

We are in the nursing home where she lives, in a large room that my mother has reserved for the occasion.  It is by no means fancy, but that matters little to the people gathered there.  They are there to honor and love my grandmother, who was the epitome of grace.  Much like my mother, whose name means grace, by the way.

The above photo was a moment I captured on film that day when my oldest child made my brother laugh  -- two first borns making a connection through humor.  I don't know what she said, but he liked it.

On that day there was food and music and stories were told.  There were lots of hugs and kisses and laughter.  Photos were taken.  Gifts were given.  Friends came.  We stayed the day.  My grandmother's photo was in the local newspaper soon thereafter, a picture with then baby Shawn reaching up to her.   The photograph accompanied a very nice story about Grandma and her life's accomplishments. After all, not too many people live to be 100, and she was a long time beloved teacher in this small town.

Grandma died after she turned 100, about a year after the party to celebrate her life. My brother, pictured above, is a doctor.  He had told her years before, when she was in her eighties, "Grandma you're so healthy you'll live to be a hundred!" She believed him.

She was such a great lady.  She encouraged us and welcomed us at every visit, and supported my parents in every way.  She was always helping her friends and neighbors.  She loved to crochet and made most of the gifts she gave to us. She was gentle and kind, but a little stern.  We were expected to behave around her, but we did, we loved her so.  

Now there are even more great grandchildren in the family than there were in 2006. This summer many of us will reunite.  I am excited.  I miss my family. Thank goodness for good memories!

        Grandma with my mom and uncle

corner view~small things

It's the small things that matter.  It's the time we take to pay attention to details -- a handmade card, a compliment, a note, a smile.  Don't underestimate the importance of the small things.  In many ways, they are actually big things.

a little trip

We took the kids away for a few days over their spring break.  It was really relaxing.  We stayed in a B&B in a small town outside of a big city.  We made the venture to the big city for dinner and to visit a college.  Other than that we were happy to explore the town with its beaches, shops and hikes.

This year since school started I have taken four trips.  This was the last one.  It really made a difference to leave home that many times.  It feels like the year flew by and we are already gearing up for our summer travels.  

shawn is 11

Happy birthday to the sweetest boy who keeps us laughing, who is feisty, fun, full of energy, and gives us so much joy.  We love you.  We are proud of you. Thank you for coming into our lives eleven years ago!

prom

 

Here she is, all grown up and looking fancy.

Wow.

Time flies.

annabel

Annabel's album is bringing the family together musically like never before. They had another day of success in the studio yesterday, this time, with Shawn on the drums!! He blew everyone away. They're all having such a big time, it's thrilling to see.  And daddy is the producer.  In many ways, life is as good as it gets.

corner view~something(s) to celebrate

Lately we are celebrating a few things.

Little Miss Skylar is now a licensed driver!  Last week she passed her road test on her first try.  Most kids here take several attempts at the test before they pass, so this was an overnight change that we didn't expect to happen so quickly. Sky is now beginning to take the car and go off on her own - shopping, to tennis class, to the grocery store for starters.  I am celebrating my willingness to trust that she will be okay every time she drives away.  There is a natural letting go that happens with kids, each step of the way. This part is not easy for me, but it is important for us to let them do these things so our kids develop independence, experience and trust in themselves. Luckily Sky is a careful, thoughtful, level headed girl, and a good driver.

Miss Annabel is continuing to record her album!  She goes into the studio this weekend with Shawn, who is doing the drum parts.  Pretty exciting!  They have been practicing a whole lot.  Just yesterday Annabel wrote a new song.  She has many great songs.  I can't wait to see how they sound.  She is our little rock star, eagerly awaiting band camp this summer where she will get to play music with kids her age.  

And Mr. Shawn.  Well, what do you get when you combine Shawn, his favorite toy, and a ripe bunch of bananas?  The Amma Kendama Project, as Shawn calls it.   This is Shawn's attempt to raise money for charity.  With my help he is selling baked goods to friends and neighbors.  Then we are going to buy a bunch of kendamas, wholesale. Then we will pack them up and bring them on our summer trip. Our first stop will be a retreat with Amma.  Shawn is going to donate the kendamas to Amma's bookstore. All profits will benefit Amma's various worldwide charities.  And these toys are fun, and occupy kids for long periods of time, which is good when parents are on retreat. I'd much rather have my kid playing with one of these than playing a video game.  We were joking about how maybe all the swamis will play with them. So we may have to get some orange ones.

So far we have fifteen orders and have gotten over $200.  We have made granola and baked blueberry muffins, oatmeal cookies, and banana bread.  Lots of banana bread. More to come.  Meanwhile, would you like a blueberry muffin?  They are divine.      

more from my trip

The first night I arrived a young woman named Gopi picked me up from the airport to deliver me to the house where I was staying.  To Julia's house.  It was pitch black outside and the air was cold, but so fresh, smelling of oak and eucalyptus when I got dropped at her house up on top of a mountain.  Julia was so excited to show me her neighborhood that we all went for a walk, right then, in the dark night air.  There were no streetlights, and we made our way, allowing our eyes to adjust and using the moonlight as a guide.

I saw many things on that trip.  Sights and colors and images to inspire the budding photographer that I am.  I wished I had a lens on my camera that would zoom closer. Still I captured the images I captured.

One night we went to her local farmer's market on the way into town.  As we were leaving a group of teens sang "Singing in the Rain" flash mob style.  Then we made our way down the mountain to join her husband for dinner -- turkey burgers at a Stanford cafe.  I got a blueberry milkshake to go with mine, splitting my burger with their daughter.

One day Julia took me on a walk in her neighborhood to introduce me to a 300 year old oak tree, which in an earlier photo you will see, got a hug from me.

One of my favorite memories from the trip was attending a talk at Stanford with Julia's husband while she put their young daughter to bed.  Just being on the campus was good for me.  I miss the stimulation of young interested minds. We get set in our ways as we age, and seeing all those college kids made me remember what it was like to be young, inspired, on fire with conviction and ambition.  Maybe one day I will go back to school.  You never know.