the girls

There is such comfort in my parents' home.  This is not the house of my childhood, and yet there are so many memories here.  It was here that Gary and I first told Mom and Dad they would be grandparents for the first time.   It was here that we celebrated our first Christmas as a family when Sky was a baby.  It was here that Gary played football in the snow with my brothers.   Our children have only known this home, and have grown up visiting this home.  My parents moved here right after I was married.

There is such comfort in an afternoon spent with my mother and sister -- shopping and having a sandwich and tea for lunch in an old Victorian mansion turned restaurant.  There is nothing in the world like this day, so special in its simplicity, while your father generously watches your sis's three young children in his home and your husband watches your three.  Just so you can have some time with the girls.    

corner view~spirituality

Sky, age 9

To me, spiritual principles are the guiding light in worldly life.  I think that spirituality is about cultivating our hearts through love, compassion and selfless service.  It is said by wise masters that spirituality is about calming our minds by developing qualities such as patience, kindness, introspection, and selflessness, regardless of what we are faced with.  One of my favorite teachings...It is easy to be peaceful and happy when things go your way.  It's entirely different to do this when faced with adversity, be it large or small. 

No easy task if you are committed to this as a daily practice.

In an attempt to try this, for the last ten months I have put aside about an hour a day for quiet prayer and meditation.  I have only missed a few days.  When I miss more than two days in a row I really feel it.  At first I loved it.  Then I hated it and became very resistant.  But I kept at it.  Now I love this time.  I need it.  I have noticed a change within myself.  Generally, I am more peaceful.  I am calmer.  I can focus better in the day.  I can tune into my intuition more easily.  Most days I have more of a sense of humor.   I am more honest with myself about my faults.  And I feel more in the flow of life. 

I am grateful to have this time.  I have had to change my busy life to fit this in, and make it a priority.  But I think it is invaluable.  

full circle

 

Lately my life has seemed to be a completion of circles.  I suppose this is typical of middle aged people with teens.  We remember what it was like to be teens.  We are getting older, and we feel it.  And the kids are growing into their adulthood, in front of our eyes.

I had a visit this summer with a friend I met at age 11.  She came with her three boys, one now a teen.  I hadn't seen them in two years.  The change that was most striking to me wasn't her little ones, and it wasn't my friend.  It was her oldest son.  When he came to the door, there stood before me a young man, a young man I so remember as a smiling little boy with his two teeth missing.

If you look closely, the boy is still there.  Within the adult, the child within us is still there.  

Thank God for friends to go through life with.  And this is one friend I have had the blessing of knowing well for a long, long time.  I won't say how long, lest you math wizzes figure out my age.

And thank God for these relationships for our kids.  There is something so special about knowing someone your entire life.   

BTW, our kids had a blast.  In case you can't tell.     

in summertime

There was time for driving down country roads, shopping at Anthropologie with my mom, watching Irish dancers, and listening to the Dady Brothers play music, going out for ice cream and a surprise call from a friend who happened to be visiting our coast, all in one week's time.

after dinner on my birthday

Walking around the charming neighborhoods of the Park Avenue area with my husband, my kids and my parents I was happy.  The girls walked ahead, arm in arm and I thought, "I am so lucky.  Look at how much they love each other.  I have done something right."  I looked at my parents, holding hands as they walked ahead of me, a sign of love that has come full circle.  I looked at all of the houses -- beautiful, big ones, some mansions.  I admired the various architectures, colors, old stone fences, magestic trees, patina details, and beautiful gardens.  Each one so lovingly cared for.  Still I wondered, what makes a house a home?  I have thought about this a lot over the years, as before I started blogging, we moved a few times, and lived in different homes.  I have realized it's the people inside that make a house a home.  It's not the place, but the love.  The love makes a home.    

if i post about my birthday four months late, does it make me younger?

Thank you everyone.    

today i went to a yoga class...

original watercolor painting 1991

....Because it was time.  I sensed it.  It had been months.  It took something -- courage, strength, resolve, reserve -- to get me there.  I don't know why it was hard to jump back in.  What I knew this morning was, it was just time.

This quote was on the yoga studio's website;
Nothing would be done at all if we waited until we could do it so well that no one could find fault with it. - Cardinal Newman

I worked with a teacher named Erika.  She talked about opening our hearts to being our authentic self, and as I write it here it sounds kind of cliche', but it was actually really beautiful.  She worked us with just the perfect amount of athletic poses, but also stretches that I needed.  I am very picky about teachers.  Years ago twenty-something Erika and I were in the same class together.  She was the yoga star, the super fit energetic young thing.  We had this incredible teacher named Marc.  After he moved away I tried many classes but I never found a teacher I liked half as much as him.  So I stopped trying.  Now Erika is a teacher with something genuine to offer me, and others.

I liked her class.  It felt great to do an actual class, versus practicing yoga at home which I have been doing.  I naturally worked longer and harder than I do when I am on my own.  And I didn't make a complete fool of myself!

I will go back.  Thanks Erika.  

corner view~longing

original watercolor painting 1993

It seems to me that most people long for freedom from something.

What do you long for?    

friends

Many years ago in my first year, first semester of college, in 8 am philosophy class I met a young woman who became a very dear friend.

We started talking one day after class, and we never stopped.

Thank God for Janel.  Nellie, I call her.

And now my kids consider her kids to be their dear friends.

It is the coolest thing.  I love it when friendship spans the generations like this.   Effortlessly.

our time in virginia...

...Included visits with friends, a visit to Old Town Alexandria and a visit to see Amma.

There is nothing like old friends.  Whenever we go to Virginia we get to see two families - some of our oldest and dearest friends.  I am so grateful that they both live relatively near each other.  And we stay with them, instead of in hotels, which of course is much more fun.   We share meals together, we relax together, we stay up late talking, we play music.  We laugh and talk about years of memories.

There is nothing like Old Town Alexandria.  It is old but alive, artistic, joyous, beautiful, fun.  I love going there, it is a magical place for me.  I lived there in my twenties, and wrote about it here and here.  I love that I got to live there, when I was a single gal, out of graduate school, a working girl.  I love that I got to live with one of my best friends at the time, who is still one of my best friends.  It was while we lived in Alexandria that I was invited to a party with some med students from Georgetown, and at this party my friend met her husband.  I kinda dragged her there, she wasn't in the mood to go.  She was glad we went! 

We took the kids to see Amma.  She was at a hotel in Virginia.  In fact her programs were held in a huge ballroom where twenty plus years ago I attended a conference on multiple personality disorder.  I was interning as an art therapist in a psychiatric hospital, and my boss was the chairman of the conference. 

It was great to see Amma.  We got to talk with her.  She is always so encouraging of the children.  Over the years the girls have performed music for Amma, and she is always so happy when they do this.  In fact it was Amma who first asked Sky to sing in public.   

There is no one like Amma.  That is for sure.  Sometimes she gives apples when you go up for her darshan.  Sky was thrilled to get her first one.  This summer Amma spoke and laughed with everyone.  She comforted sad people and made administrative decisions about her numerous charities and her hospital and gave people advice, all the while hugging everyone who came to see her until all hours of the night, her one cheek bruised from the constant contact she has with so many people's faces and heads pulled to this one side and, as usual, I was inspired.